From A Branding Point Of View, “Christian” Is Kinda Spent; Followers Of Jesus Need A New Name

I’ll own it — a born atheist has no business telling Christians anything about their brand. Except, Christianity — being a sales-based religion (“Hey, have ya heard the ‘good news’ style proselytizing started with Paul, the actual inventor of Christianity) — relies almost entirely on how it’s perceived by others. After all, isn’t the point of me hearing “the good news” the hope that I’ll come to my senses and convert?

Christians are preaching to a shrinking choir. Have they ever stopped to ask themselves why? No, they haven’t — because self-analysis isn’t part of the brand. Confession is. So’s an intense focus on rules & regs at the diminishing expense of any sort of spirituality. Christianity’s problem isn’t branding. Christianity’s problem is its brand.

I’ve blogged on many occasions with receipts (so I won’t do it here) about the Christian Church’s origins. It’s entirely Paul’s invention. Entirely. Jesus’ simple (Jewish) message — Do Unto Others — got subsumed into and under the mythology that Paul created and spread to the brand new churches forming across the Roman world. Paul never met Jesus. Never heard Jesus preach or teach. He failed trying to sell his version of Jesus to the Jews (with its wild, magic-heavy “proofs” that Jesus was the messiah) and, so, turned to the Gentiles.

The Gentiles, having no knowledge of (or concern for) Jewish mythology, accepted Paul’s version — because why wouldn’t they? Paul had created something genius — a way to conquer death. Accept Jesus as your lord and savior and you can live forever.

That has nothing to do with “Doing Unto Others”. And the church Paul created was big on forcing non-Christians to accept Jesus. Ironically, those Christians were going to “Do Unto Others” on pain of death.

The Catholic Church, once it acquired political power, never let that power go. Whatever spirituality there was in the institution died. More irony — Jesus preached against having churches because churches, he said, were corrupt. What could be more corrupt than the Catholic Church? Almost from the day it hung out its shingle, the Catholic Church has concerned itself with rules & regs, getting money into its coffers, and increasing its “membership”.

There is no way to count the number of humans who have died because of religion. Christianity — with its crusades and its inquisitions and its own internecine wars — has put its stamp on a veritable shit ton of them. And all to sell a product that its own supposed creator would never ever EVER recognize.

The Christian Church and Jesus aren’t just estranged, they’re strangers. That disconnect is what’s killing the church (whether Catholic or Protestant). I have a dear friend — a Presbyterian minister — whose job is trying to keep Presbyterian congregations alive.

The proud conservative Christians running the Republican Party — bowing in total obeisance to the evangelicals — have also helped destroy any notion that such a thing as “Christian mercy” exists outside of a sanctimonious Sunday sermon. Brown Children in cages was not what Jesus had children suffering unto in his mind.

If I’m a brand that needs new followers to stay alive — that needs brand loyalty from current followers — that has to compete with a thousand more ideas than it ever had to before — I’m afraid (if I’m Christianity). I wouldn’t be however, if I were Jesus.

Is there a more potent antidote the vile, self-serving piggery of Trumpism than “Do Unto Others”? Republicanism — same question. Christianity — you, too.

Jesus and Christianity have nothing to do with each other. Followers of Jesus — even now — are loathe to associate themselves with evangelicals or the rapey Catholic Church or any of the rules & regs heavy institutions their parents forced on them when they were kids.

I would say Followers Of Jesus need a new Paul — to create a new institution that gets the mythology right. But, right off the bat, that would violate one of Jesus’ core tenants — the need for a church.

Maybe a better way to go would be to actually follow Jesus. If you want to follow him theistically — go directly to god. Skip the institution. If you just want to Do Unto Others? Well, who’s stopping you? All you have to do is “Do”.

Maybe the best new brand for Followers Of Jesus is to call themselves DUO’s. They Do Unto Others. That’s all you need to know about them (so long as their actions match their words). I’d say they don’t even need that.

But what do I know? I’m just a dumb atheist.

Of Peckers & Peccadilloes — What IS It About Men & Their “Manhood”?

Things that begin with the letter “P” — Peculiar… Powerful… Pederast… Pervert… Penis.

Peckers, too. And Peccadilloes.

One of the stories that’s already bubbled up in the Jeffrey Epstein saga is his apparent need for a minimum of three orgasms a day. On the one hand, I do admire the man’s capacity. On the other hand — dude, take care of business yourself if it’s that urgent — and get some therapy; you’re addicted. The question is “to what?”

I suspect that, in too many men’s minds, sex gets conflated with power whereas it should be conjoined to love. Even if you’re not in love with a sexual partner, it’s nice if you at least like them. Better yet, respect them. It says something about YOU when you regularly have sex with people YOU don’t respect.

The bottom line about male sexuality is this — by our very nature, we’re “squirt-n-go” creatures. Our orgasm, pleasurable as it is, is 100% reproductive. Everything about the male orgasm focuses on getting our DNA from inside our nutsack to the inside of a female where, if all goes to genetic plan, our sperm will race toward a waiting egg.

What happens after that — to a male — is almost entirely irrelevant. He may rise to the challenge and become a great father but that’s entirely up to him. He could just as easily squirt n go. As lots of men do.

Women, on the other hand, can orgasm all they like — without it ever making them pregnant. Their orgasm, as far as we know, is all about pleasure. They don’t even have to have an egg in the chamber, ready for fertilization, to have orgasms by the bucket. But if a man ejaculates inside of them — achieves his orgasm without any protection — and there is an egg in the chamber? That’s a whole other story.

No woman would ever speak the words “I alone can fix it” as Donald Trump has repeatedly. Trump’s not the only man to think that way about himself. A dude driving around lost, refusing to ask for directions, suffers from the exact same delusion. Female biology necessitates communal thinking instead. While it’s possible to bear and raise a child alone, doing it alone makes success highly unlikely for either parent or child. Even a woman without a mate still needs the better part of a village to successfully raise a child.

Stories about twisted female sexuality are fascinating as much for the twisted sexuality as for how unusual they are (most often it’s a female school teacher and a boy she fixated on). Most stories about twisted sexuality are all about men. Catholic priests, for instance. The man who sexually molested me when I was 14 (I’ve learned about him that he grew up the youngest boy in a group of Yeshiva boys trying to outrun WWII where he was likely bullied and sexually assaulted himself). Jeffrey Epstein — and every man who partook of the underage action Jeff provided.

A cultural shift is happening as we speak. We’re finally dis-empowering the penis. It’s about damned time. Men who think with their penises have made a mess of the planet and civilization.

Just because your pecker says it wants something doesn’t mean it gets the thing it wants. There are rules even a penis has to follow. Penises have to ask permission to go places. If a vagina or a mouth or a rectum agrees unconditionally to a penis coming for a visit? That penis has permission.

BUT — all permission is conditional. Penises must behave at all times — and a misbehaving penis (a penis NOT playing by the agreed-upon rules) is a penis who deserves to be expelled.

By the way, a well-behaving penis is also a responsible penis. If there’s a dress code — raincoats required — all penises are therefore required to dress before gaining entry. Whining and cajoling are bullshit.

If the male of the species is ever going to be fully civilized — I hold out hope though not much — he’s going to have to learn to get good at another “M” word — “masturbation”. Men need to learn that every single urge they feel CAN in fact be dealt with directly. And, hey — contrary to what our various religions taught us, masturbation’s actually healthy.

How’s this for irony — what men need to learn MOST about their own sexuality? “I alone can fix it”.

American Culture Has A White-Christian-Male Bias & It Needs To Go

How many guilty Catholic priests does it take to screw in a light bulb?  Better question — How many guilty Catholic priests (guilty of SCREWING children) does it take before a Culture opens its damned eyes?

That blind spot isn’t the Catholic Church’s alone.  The man who sexually assaulted me worked for a synagogue.  Jews do it too.  And Protestants and Muslims.  I suspect other religions do it, too but I’m not too well-versed in their cultures; I know from Abrahamic religions — they all flow from the same toxic male bias.  The religious elements are all really just ‘overlays’ of male self-aggrandizement.  If you really, really look at them, Abrahamic religions have a nasty habit of making its male believers believe not so much ‘in’ a god as that ‘THEY THEMSELVES’ are gods.

They are not made in Yahweh’s image (Yahweh’s his name, god is his job description), Yahweh is made in theirs.

When you start out — deep down — thinking YOU are ‘the gods’ — and if YOU have control of the Culture (made much easier when you tell everyone that YOU and YOU alone can communicate with ‘the gods’) — things like ‘bias’ just sort of flow naturally.  Like toxic waste from a turd factory.

What we Americans need to grasp is that we begin every conversation or debate about who we are with a heavy bias that distorts our image.  We are NOT that thing the Culture insists we are.  We are not predominantly White-Christian-Male — and never were.

But, when you jealously guard the means to tell stories to the widest possible audience, you risk fooling yourself first and foremost.

White-Christian-Male Culture wants us all to believe their excrement smells like roses.  It doesn’t.  They know better than anyone.

They’ve stacked the deck best they can to keep hold of their Ivory Tower.  Problem is, they’re surrounded — by the rest of us.  We need to overtake them — remove them from their tower and then remove their tower, too.  It all needs to go.

It will start — shortly — with our votes.