“Karma’s A Stone Cold Bitch: Mitch McConnell Scorched Earth Edition”

Gulp! Moscow Mitch McConnell looks behind — sees Karma gaining on him fast! Inside his turtle head, he thinks “Please, Turtle feets, don’t fail me now!

Yesterday, Mitch McConnell got up on his turtle hind legs and insisted that if the Democrats dare tamper with the filibuster (to keep Mitch from killing all legislation) then he’d scorch the earth even worse than he’s already scorched it. If ever a turtle-faced traitor needed to have the words “SHUT UP!” howled in his treason turtle face, it’s Mitch. When we get to the end of this sorry-assed saga, Mitch McConnell will stand as one of American history’s uberest Uber-Villains. His name will replace Benedict Arnold’s as the epithet hurled when you want to call someone a “traitor”. If you want to know just how severely damaged Moscow Mitch is — he’s a lonely bully having his revenge on the rest of the schoolyard — read Jane Meyer’s excellent piece on Mitch in the New Yorker.

Mitch stands astride his greatest (possible) accomplishment — the hijacking of the judiciary by the RW Money (what Mitch sees as his actual constituency). For that alone, Mitch deserves every bit of Karma coming to him.

But there’s so much more Karma coming to Mitch. But for Donald Trump, there is no insurrection. But for Russia, Trump is never president. But for Mitch McConnell, Russia does not succeed as handsomely as it did. If I were ‘In Control’ of Karma — and I could create a ‘Karma Tree’ that would guide all of Mitch’s future incarnations — based on what he REALLY deserves — Mitch’s Karma would go something like this…

Mitch dies and comes back as “Mitch McConnell:  Toilet Brush” —

A Toilet Brush or Mitch

But here’s the ‘rub’ — ‘MITCH THE TOILET BRUSH‘ lives HERE —

WORST TOILET

Yeah — even worse than ‘The Worst Toilet In Scotland’…

A lot worse, it turns out — because THIS is the REFUGEE CAMP where Mitch’s Toilet lives — and CHOLERA just broke out all across the camp…

Refugee Camp

And there’s already a LINE to use Mitch’s Toilet (and every last person in line has EXPLOSIVE DIARRHEA) —

line of refugees 1

  And that line goes on…

Line of Refugees 2

And on…

Refugees3

And on… And STILL, it gets worse for Mitch — Cos THIS is the creature at the very end of that line…

Monster at end of line

And it doesn’t make ‘dainty’ piles like THIS —

pileofcrap

Nope — it produces an endless stream of foul-smelling poison as toxic as Mitch’s ‘soul’. And just as Mitch sees how massive and unending that STREAM OF LIQUID SHIT IS

He wakes up — and realizes it was all in his head — A DAYDREAM!

And that makes Mitch happy (even happier than Koch Money does when it lines his pockets — and that’s a lot of happy).

Happy Mitch

Everything, Mitch realizes, is back to normal.  And he turns to go about what he was doing (before that awful daydream) and he reaches out TO SHAKE THE HAND of THIS MAN —

THE HANDSHAKE

And the KARMA TREE starts all over again…

Forever and ever and ever… Hey, Karma: Three, two, one — GO!

Hey, Democrats — Here’s Some Fun We Can Have With Mitch McConnell, The US Senate And America’s Future

It bears repeating: when this is all done and said, Mitch McConnell’s name will replace Benedict Arnold’s as the epithet Americans use when they want to call someone “a traitor”. “You Mitch McConnell, you!” people will scream at people like… well, Mitch McConnell. Because they’re traitors. Mitch McConnell IS a traitor. That’s not hyperbole. It’s not emotion speaking. Is it ironclad? Not 100%, no — we’ll need to put Mitch under oath to ice that cake. That’s about to happen. I bet it’s pretty top-of-the-list when Merrick Garland punches in finally. How did Russia gain so much traction inside our government? Hey, Mitch — got any ideas how that might have happened? Remember, pal — you’re under oath. I want to believe there are Democrats in power today who’d sell their families into bondage to get a chance to take down Mitch McConnell. Well, Democrats — you CAN do that — right now, in fact!

Let’s put this essential fact on the table first: Kentucky is one of those states where, should a sitting Senator be forced from office, the GOVERNOR gets to appoint a replacement until the next scheduled election. The governor of Kentucky right now is Andy Beshear — A DEMOCRAT. So, if we could find a way to take Mitch McConnell out of the picture, The Democratic governor of Kentucky could — legally — replace Republican Mitch with the Democrat of his choice.

That’s where Merrick Garland comes in. Among the questions in the soon-to-be AG’s head should be these: “Why did Mitch McConnell refuse Barack Obama when President Obama wanted to inform America — before election 2016 — that RUSSIA was actively engaged in throwing the election to Trump — and does Mitch’s relationship with Russian oligarch and former military intelligence officer OLEG DERIPASKA have anything to do with it?” That’s important because Deripaska got sanctioned for what he did in the 2016 election — he received proprietary polling data (concerning Pennsylvania, Wisconsin and Michigan) that was weaponized into personalized ads that showed up on the personal Facebook pages of Black, Democratic voters in Pennsylvania, Wisconsin and Michigan. Deripaska got sanctioned for the same reason Paul Manafort went to prison.

Deripaska committed a crime against We The People. And yet — not only did Mitch McConnell refuse to give us a “head’s up” that Russia was actively trying to do this to us, Mitch PROFITED from it! Mitch got those sanctions against Deripaska LIFTED — in January 2019 — so that Deripaska could “gift” western Kentucky with $300 million dollars worth of aluminum factory. When you consider, on top of that, Mitch’s resistance to election security, his refusal to question Trump’s odd relationship with Vladimir Putin and his participation in every last bit of Trump’s obstruction of justice, ya gotta believe Mitch McConnell has secrets.

Once AG Garland begins pulling threads on the “Mitch McConnell” sweater, that ugly, old thing will come apart like a Trump family reunion.

Now, here’s where the fun begins. Mitch knows he’s got secrets. The Democrats know Mitch has secrets. Mitch knows that once his secrets stop being secret, this will kill the Republican Party dead — because they hitched a cynical plan to assert permanent minority rule (by them) to Donald Trump despite KNOWING that he was even more corrupt than they were — because he was owned outright by Russia. Mitch KNOWS that the GOP committed TREASON at its very highest level in order to grab power.

This was entirely “do or die”. You can’t plan and execute an insurrection (Republicans both planned and executed this thing) and expect nothing to happen to you. Oh, sure — the Republicans “might still” think they’ll get away with it but then, Merrick Garland hasn’t been sworn in yet. People like Mitch McConnell and Ted Cruz and Josh Hawley haven’t been subpoenaed and placed under oath. People like Matt Gaetz, Devin Nunes and Jim Jordan haven’t been “Benghazi’d” yet — grilled to the gills about all the strange things they’ve done the past four years. What do you think people like Lauren Bobert will say — under oath — when questioned about her real-time participation in an act of real-time sedition?

Mitch McConnell is now officially “low hanging fruit”. He’s there to be taken, Democrats — and all you have to do (well, all AG Garland has to do) is sit Mitch down for questioning. Once Mitch is under oath and backtracking furiously though, Democrats, that’s the time to finish Mitch. Use the court of public opinion. Ask the questions out loud about Mitch and his relationship with hostile foreign actors like Deripaska. Demand Mitch tell us where his loyalties lie. Who, Mitch, are your REAL constituents?

Fortunately for Mitch, his wife’s rich so the cost of defending him won’t bankrupt the family. The cost of defending Elayne Chao, his beard however…

How Mitch is on one side of being indicted will be very different from how Mitch is on the other side of being indicted. For Mitch, it will be akin to getting dragged — kicking and screaming — from his turtle shell, having to stand before us buck naked. For what it’s worth, that will be as hard on us as it will be for Mitch. Who the hell wants that image burned into their mind’s eye forever?

At some point, the physical cost of defending himself will preclude continuing on as Kentucky’s senior corrupt senator. He’s no spring chicken. More like an old dinosaur. He hasn’t looked well lately. Knowing what he knows about what he did and what the consequences will be, Mitch will be forced to step down. He really won’t have a choice.

Hey, remember Kentucky’s Democratic governor, Andy Beshear? This is where he steps to the plate — and flips Mitch’s long-time-Red Senate seat from red to blue. Even if it was only temporary, the only reason it’d be happening is because Mitch finally got caught being the corrupt Treason Turtle he is. But, Mitch’s seat flipping from red to blue might NOT be all that temporary. While we’re pulling the thread on Mitch’s corruption sweater, let’s pull the thread on how exactly Mitch keeps getting elected by huge numbers in a state where pretty much everyone hates his guts. That thread, count on it, will lead to a whole other corrupt sweater — the one that explains 1) HOW Mitch keeps cheating his way to re-election, 2) how Republican-owned electronic voting machine companies ES&S and Diebold use their internet-connected backdoors to pad Republican election totals, and 3) how that padding technique closed the deal and “won” Pennsylvania, Wisconsin and Michigan for Trump in 2016.

Nothing America’s about to learn about Trump and the GOP and the full, ugly extent of their seditious behavior will endear us to them. There will not be a single bit of good news. Nothing will suddenly make us all think “Oh, right — now we understand why you all did it — it all makes sense!” Instead, our disgust for Republicans, their party, their hypocrisy — it will compound like usurious daily interest. We will not hear any evidence that a single Republican had anything but malice in mind.

Hey, Mitch — caveat emptor, understand? Ya puts yer money down, ya takes yer chance! You bet on permanent minority rule. You bet on Donald Trump (despite what you knew). You bet on sedition and treason and, frankly, evil.

If I were governor of Kentucky instead of Andy Beshear, when that moment came to replace you, I would find an actual SOCIALIST and name them Mitch’s replacement. But — most importantly — before Mitch found out, I’d get a whole bunch of cameras on him. Mitch does “I lost” better than almost anyone. Remember this?

Remember how good this moment felt, Democrats? That was the warm up act to literal fireworks. Go after Mitch McConnell, Democrats. Do it now. Do it with justice in mind. But don’t forget to enjoy it, too. We’ve all earned it.

Oh, What A Tangled Web We Weave When We’re A Corrupt Treason Turtle

When the story of our times gets written — with the perspective of history — Senate Majority Leader Mitch McConnell will be infamous as one of America’s worst traitors ever. Moscow Mitch’s name will replace Benedict Arnold’s as the epithet Americans use to call other Americans “traitor”. Mitch still thinks he’s on a grand crusade to re-cast the judiciary as the last bastion of white, Christian male hegemony.

That grand plan isn’t Mitch’s. Mitch McConnell doesn’t do grand plans. He’s a functionary. A petty politician doing the dirty working for Big Money Interests. The Big Money has the grand plans — an unfair world where they all get richer while the rest of us fall further behind, our debt growing, our health failing.

Mitch is their bitch. His job — manifest these terrible, repressive, regressive grand plans into our reality.

That’s why Mitch worked so hard to deny Barack Obama all those federal bench openings. It’s why Mitch denied Obama so much as a hearing for Merrick Garland. Mitch was in the middle of pleasing his masters — of hijacking the judiciary on the sly. Here’s the thing: the popular vote reflects the majority’s voice. Barack Obama was the majority’s voice and choice — to fill every judicial vacancy during his tenure. Our voice and choice was denied us by Mitch McConnell — for the benefit of his masters. That is not hyperbole.

And this is not how our democracy is supposed to work. Not according to the rules or the rule of law.

In addition to destroying the judiciary, Mitch also has destroyed the Senate. Anyone suggesting the Democrats aren’t showing enough comity toward their Republican co-workers needs to shut up. Comity will be reserved for whatever party replaces the Republicans. No one who calls himself “A Republican” can do so without also being a Trumpist. Trumpism & Republicanism are now equal in every way.

Mitch has operated in the shadows for most of his career. He’s about to end his career in the spotlight. That is, his corruption is.

The Democrats are about to retake the Senate. What was a likelihood before is now a dead certainty. RBG’s passing — even without all the additional political baggage — would have moved people to action. It would have motivated tens of millions of women at the very least. Now it’s a question of Legacy. And reproductive rights. And basic health.

What happened in 2018 — that massive blue “wave” — wasn’t a wave. It was the leading edge of a much larger wave. The Trump years have torn every last bit of cover off our various failings. Remember — we didn’t vote for this, this was forced on us. Donald Trump — with massive Russian assistance — stole the outcome of election 2016. Together they stole our intention — what WE wanted this country to do for our benefit and in our name. Their aim is to make that theft permanent.

Their problem: America’s women aren’t down with and aren’t going to be. Ever. That’s Mitch McConnell’s biggest miscalculation of all.

Mitch, when he’s done, will have finished the hard work of turning America’s women into the most potent, dynamic, unstoppable political force in America. He’ll be shocked by how socialist they are by nature. Of course women are more “socialist” — they care above all about their babies and they KNOW from pure experience that it DOES take a “village” to raise a child — of family members and community members and teachers and mentors and coaches and friends. The healthier and happier that village is, the healthier and happier their babies will be.

Women — and I’m generalizing, but biology does impact us in particular ways — think communally — and seek the group’s wisdom before making a decision while men think they alone can fix it. If we look at the current world leaders and how they’ve handled the pandemic, the women — Angela Merkle in Germany, Jacinda Ardern in New Zealand — did especially well in both protecting their people but also protecting their economies.

I’ll go further onto this limb. Merkle and Ardern’s success relative to Trump’s stems in large part from their political and personal strengths and skills but also, to a measurable degree, from their chromosomes. They have a little more empathy baked into their genetics. That radiates in the form of humanity — and then policy.

America truly stands on the precipice. We will go one way or the other. There’s no middle route.

Either Mitch McConnell will see the rot he introduced succeed or Mitch will fail spectacularly with dire, terrible consequences for every single Republican legislator who had the least inkling what Mitch was up to. Keep in mind — Mitch is a traitor. That’s not hyperbole either. He’s taken gobs of Russian money into his campaign coffers (though legally via his PAC but not-so-legally with added perspective), denied We The People the knowledge that Russia was fixing the 2016 election for Trump, canned the sanctions Obama implemented BECAUSE of that election interference and TO THIS DAY has refused to spend a penny on election security.

Mitch McConnell is one of the biggest traitors in all American history. And THAT isn’t hyperbole.

It’s vitally important that we not only punish Mitch McConnell for what he’s done but that we punish him to the very fullest extent the rule of law allows. We need to make an example out of Mitch for all time. We need to send the lesson that, perhaps, would have been sent had we punished Richard Nixon instead of pardoning him — abuse of power (especially at the executive level) is wholly unacceptable.

Mitch is already the architect of his own downfall. We owe it to Mitch to see that those plans get carried out all the way.

The SCOTUS Should Look Like America, Not Just Repressive, White, Christian Men And Their Handmaiden

Fact: the Republican Party is, as we speak, hijacking the judiciary. What began as Mitch McConnell’s secret mission — begun the day Barack Obama became POTUS — became clear the day Trump assumed the office he stole as Mitch began filling the federal bench with lifetime appointments — each and every one a right wing hack put there to carry out a very specific right wing agenda — the majority of America (not right wing) be damned. By hijacking the judiciary, McConnell and the Right Wing Money (the Kochs, the Mercers, etc) hope to stave off the political extinction rushing toward them.

Hey, Mitch — no, it won’t. In fact, this coup d’etat will have hastened not only your extinction but the end of your freedom, too. You will all end up in prison. That’s not political revenge — and you know it. It’s the rule of law reasserting itself. It’s oversight. It’s the Constitution. It’s Justice (with a capital “J”). And, by the way — all those judges you shoved down our throats? By the time we’re finished, every last one of them will be gone one way or another. Most (Brett Kavanaugh especially) will have to answer for committing perjury during their confirmation hearings. As Brett Kavanaugh did repeatedly.

The whole gambit will die right there, Mitch. Your six-to-three majority will shrink to a five to four again. But that won’t matter after the Democrats — having the Senate now and even more of the House under their control (and with the Progressive crazies running rampant!) — increase the SCOTUS to 15 or 17 seats so that it better represents a diverse America and not just a coterie of rich, white, Christian men. And their brand new literal handmaiden Amy Coney Barrett.

Will the Democrats pack the bench? You better believe it. But then, the Democrats won’t do it like pigs at a trough — like Republicans. Remember Merrick Garland — Obama’s nominee in an election year? The whole thing about Garland was his moderation. He was chosen as a reasonable reach-across-the-aisle to the GOP, someone whose moderation even they could embrace. Except Mitch McConnell had a hijacking on his mind. He even said so.

Mitch’s whole Life’s Work was seizing the judiciary for his monied overlords. As he rots in prison (and we should do everything we can to keep Mitch alive for as long as possible), Mitch will watch that Life’s Work get razed — right alongside that Russian aluminum factory he got in exchange for lifting the sanctions on Oleg Deripaska — who, in 2016, received the proprietary polling data for Minnesota, Wisconsin, Michigan and Pennsylvania (from Paul Manafort) that turned into a three-state, 77,000 combined electoral college “win”. Mitch isn’t just a traitor, he’s an uber traitor.

His name will replace Benedict Arnold’s as the epithet Americans use when they want to call someone a “traitor”.

Ah, but that’s not even the best part!

The whole point of Mitch’s gambit — stealing the judiciary for his RW Monied Overlords — was to create a state of permanent minority rule instead of the far more socialized America a diversifying population in an increasingly complex world would push it toward being. The right wants to kill Obamacare because it’s the first step toward “socialized medicine”. THAT’S what scares the right more than anything. Are they all that heavily invested in for-profit medicine?

As America settles into the security of knowing their essential health CARE (not the insurance) is PAID FOR — in other words, they can never go broke or lose their home because the got ill — we won’t thank Mitch and his wannabe slave masters, but we will chuckle. And, as we think of them — eating prison dinner for the rest of their lives — that chuckle will probably become full on laughter.

Yeah, there’ll be a touch of meanness to it. I’ll apologize in advance. But, for the most part? That laughter will be joyous — and righteous as hell.

“Karma’s A Stone Cold Bitch: Moscow Mitch Edition”

Gulp! Moscow Mitch McConnell looks behind — sees Karma gaining on him fast! Inside his turtle head, he thinks “Please, Turtle feets, don’t fail me now!

When we get to the end of this sorry-assed saga, Mitch McConnell will stand as one of American history’s uberest Uber-Villains. His name will replace Benedict Arnold’s as the epithet hurled when you want to call someone a “traitor”. If you want to know just how severely damaged Moscow Mitch is — he’s a lonely bully having his revenge on the rest of the schoolyard — read Jane Meyer’s excellent piece on Mitch in the New Yorker.

Mitch stands astride his greatest (possible) accomplishment — the hijacking of the judiciary by the RW Money (what Mitch sees as his actual constituency). For that alone, Mitch deserves every bit of Karma coming to him.

But there’s so much more Karma coming to Mitch. Remember — Mitch knew when he refused to let Obama tell the American people that Russia was actively working to make Trump president that Russia was actively working to make Trump president. He was trying to keep Russia’s secret secret from us. Mitch could stop what Trump is doing any time Mitch wants to.

If I were ‘In Control’ of Karma — and I could create a ‘Karma Tree’ that would guide all of Mitch’s future incarnations — based on what he REALLY deserves — Mitch’s Karma would go something like this…

Mitch dies and comes back as “Mitch McConnell:  Toilet Brush” —

A Toilet Brush or Mitch

But here’s the ‘rub’ — ‘MITCH THE TOILET BRUSH‘ lives HERE —

WORST TOILET

Yeah — even worse than ‘The Worst Toilet In Scotland’…

A lot worse, it turns out — because THIS is the REFUGEE CAMP where Mitch’s Toilet lives — and CHOLERA just broke out all across the camp…

Refugee Camp

And there’s already a LINE to use Mitch’s Toilet (and every last person in line has EXPLOSIVE DIARRHEA) —

line of refugees 1

  And that line goes on…

Line of Refugees 2

And on…

Refugees3

And on… And STILL, it gets worse for Mitch — Cos THIS is the creature at the very end of that line…

Monster at end of line

And it doesn’t make ‘dainty’ piles like THIS —

pileofcrap

Nope — it produces an endless stream of foul-smelling poison as toxic as Mitch’s ‘soul’. And just as Mitch sees how massive and unending that STREAM OF LIQUID SHIT IS

He wakes up — and realizes it was all in his head — A DAYDREAM!

And that makes Mitch happy (even happier than Koch Money does when it lines his pockets — and that’s a lot of happy).

Happy Mitch

Everything, Mitch realizes, is back to normal.  And he turns to go about what he was doing (before that awful daydream) and he reaches out TO SHAKE THE HAND of THIS MAN —

THE HANDSHAKE

And the KARMA TREE starts all over again…

Forever and ever and ever… Hey, Karma: Three, two, one — GO!

At Last! We’ve Reached The Part Of The Story Where Mitch McConnell Gets Revealed As The Uber Villain He’s Always Been

This won’t be news to the people who’ve been paying attention all along: Of all the villains in this story — and there are far, FAR more villains than heroes — Mitch McConnell will stand as one of our Uber Villains once all the secrets (finally) get revealed.

There are secrets to come. And Mitch has always lived with lots of secrets. It’s nothing to me who anyone else loves so long as the object of their desire is of age and the feelings between participants are mutual or at least mutual-adjacent (with a bottom line being that “no” always means “no”).

According to this 2013 post in the DailyKos (left wing for sure but not known for inventing stuff out of whole cloth), Mitch McConnell’s army discharge smacks of cover up. Sealed records? Strange, unexplained events? Sure, one could give young Mitch the benefit of the doubt — if one didn’t know what became of young Mitch. And what Young Mitch became Lying and deceit — keeping secrets from We The People — has always been Moscow Mitch’s stock in trade.

Who does Mitch represent? What I mean is — who, in Mitch’s mind, are his constituents. We know damned well it’s no one in Kentucky. Mitch’s history would tell us it’s money. Koch money, Russian money, too. Mitch hasn’t just been Donald Trump’s backstop, he’s been Russia’s backstop, too.

Let’s not forget the Gang Of Eight meeting at the White House in September 2016. The intelligence community is so concerned about information they’ve gathered about Russia’s desire to influence the 2016 presidential election on Donald Trump’s behalf that they blow all kinds of whistles. President Obama convenes a meeting at the White House where the IC presents evidence. What does Mitch McConnell do? Does he worry about Russia influencing the election’s outcome?

NO!

Mitch worries about the truth getting out to the American people. According to Slate — “McConnell raised doubts about the underlying intelligence and made clear to the administration that he would consider any effort by the White House to challenge the Russians publicly an act of partisan politics.”

Get that? Mitch told Obama that he would accuse Obama of “partisan politics” if he tried to warn us — us being We The People — that Russia was actively engaged in impacting the outcome of the election. Think about it. What Mitch had just been told wasn’t some abstraction — “Russia’s up to something but we don’t know what…” — he was told specifically what Russia was doing. This wasn’t news to Mitch. Mitch had taken gobs of Russian money. He had already been influenced in various ways by Russia

Mitch — deep in Moscow’s pocket — stood in the way of President Obama warning us about what Russia was actively doing.

Treason doesn’t get much more treason-y than that.

Remember that brand-spanking-new aluminum factory that’s going up in the poorest part of Kentucky — you know, the one paid for by Oleg Deripaska and his very Russian money? That’d be the same Oleg Deripaska who was sanctioned for participating in Russia’s attack on our 2016 election. Deripaska (once GRU, always GRU) received proprietary polling data from Paul Manafort — data for four states: Minnesota, Pennsylvania, Wisconsin and Michigan. We don’t know why Minnesota failed to ignite for Russia but clearly Pennsylvania, Wisconsin and Michigan did.

Deripaska turned the polling data over to the GRU who turned all that info about American voters into weaponized Facebook ads that showed up on individual Democratic voters’ Facebook pages (focused on Democratic voters of color) as propaganda. The goal: misinform or disinform the recipient into not showing up at the polls. This is voter suppression on the hoof.

It’s deceitful. It’s illegal. It’s so bad we sanctioned Oleg Deripaska and made it illegal for any American to do business with him. That meant nothing to Mitch. Putin wants all sanctions lifted. So does Deripaska.

So does Mitch.

See the team Mitch actually plays for? It’s not ours.

Mitch McConnell has himself done more to undermine the integrity of our Democratic Republic than almost anyone I can think of. He promised his constituents — the Republican Money — that he would hijack the judiciary for them. That’s exactly what he did. He hijacked a seat that was Obama’s to fill — and handed it to Donald Trump — a man Mitch knew for a fact was corrupt and working for a hostile foreign government.

I honestly believe that a day will come in the not-too-distant future when Americans wanting to call someone a traitor, won’t call them “Benedict Arnold” but, rather, will call them a “Mitch McConnell” instead.