Why Republicans Are Like Dimples On A Golf Ball…

Dimples On A Golf Ball

I’m feeling poetic today.  Metaphorical.  Republicans are like dimples on a golf ball — they’re all exactly alike.  If just ONE dimple is ‘DIFFERENT’, the golf ball won’t fly the same.  The change might be imperceptible to all but the most discerning eye.  Won’t matter.  The Golf Ball will know.  And republicans are the Every-Dimple-Is-Exactly-Like-Every-Other-Dimple sameness that makes their Conservative Golf Ball fly.

And, as we know from their name, CONSERVATIVES DETEST CHANGE.  They want to ‘conserve’ (ah, but — conserve WHAT?)  Which makes the thought of a golf ball not flying ‘Straight & True’ horrifying — because THAT golf ball ‘could’ change course.  It ‘could’ fly LEFT for instance…

Democrats, by comparison are a RUGBY BALL —

Rugby Ball

Nobody knows how, where (or even ‘why’ half the time) that sucker will bounce.  Makes chasing it tough but — grab it and (with lots of teamwork) get it across the finish line — good things happen.  It’s messy.  It’s ugly.  It doesn’t really make sense to Americans (rugby, we’re talking) — but we know something about it is real, authentic.

We recognize the ‘shape’ of the ball.  We recognize the physicality of the game.  We cringe even cos those players don’t wear padding.  Or helmets.  Or the body armor that NFL players suit up with.  And, instead of running on for a play or two then off, Rugby Players stay on and battle RELENTLESSLY.

Watching Rugby — it’s a lot like Democratic Politics to the average American.  They never completely get it — but most of it appeals to them.  And even if, after a while, it bores us half the time — deep down, we respect it.  Cos it’s not afraid to get down in the mud and ‘scrum’ around in it — cause how else do you get to keep The Ball?

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